Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Best Friends v.2
Tuesday, November 04, 2008
I love Democracy
Talk about early voting...5 & 1/2 weeks may not quite be old enough to participate in the democratic process, but Austin was out there none the less supporting his favorite candidate. Much to the dismay of both his grandmothers. Somehow, I think they will forgive him. Hey, at least he wore his red and blue nonpartisan jammies.
Sunday, November 02, 2008
Mr. Tambourine Man
Me and Austin in our matching Bob Dylan shirts. He is so money and he doesn't even know it. :)
Saturday, November 01, 2008
Tears, Idle Tears
by Alfred, Lord Tennyson
Tears, idle tears, I know not what they mean,
Tears from the depth of some divine despair
Rise in the heart, and gather to the eyes,
In looking on the happy Autumn-fields,
And thinking of the days that are no more.
Fresh as the first beam glittering on a sail,
That brings our friends up from the underworld,
Sad as the last which reddens over one
That sinks with all we love below the verge;
So sad, so fresh, the days that are no more.
Ah, sad and strange as in dark summer dawns
The earliest pipe of half-awakened birds
To dying ears, when unto dying eyes
The casement slowly grows a glimmering square;
So sad, so strange, the days that are no more.
Dear as remembered kisses after death,
And sweet as those by hopeless fancy feigned
On lips that are for others; deep as love,
Deep as first love, and wild with all regret;
O Death in Life, the days that are no more.
Tears, idle tears, I know not what they mean,
Tears from the depth of some divine despair
Rise in the heart, and gather to the eyes,
In looking on the happy Autumn-fields,
And thinking of the days that are no more.
Fresh as the first beam glittering on a sail,
That brings our friends up from the underworld,
Sad as the last which reddens over one
That sinks with all we love below the verge;
So sad, so fresh, the days that are no more.
Ah, sad and strange as in dark summer dawns
The earliest pipe of half-awakened birds
To dying ears, when unto dying eyes
The casement slowly grows a glimmering square;
So sad, so strange, the days that are no more.
Dear as remembered kisses after death,
And sweet as those by hopeless fancy feigned
On lips that are for others; deep as love,
Deep as first love, and wild with all regret;
O Death in Life, the days that are no more.
Multitasking and Spidey Senses
Author’s note: please read the following with a considerable dose of sarcasm…or with an Irish accent…which ever makes it sound more implausible.
As a new mother you know you have, as they say, ‘hit your stride’ when the definition of multitasking has gone from checking emails on your PDA while attending a professional development conference to peeing in the shower. Both worthy and no doubt time-saving efforts, yet somehow evidence of two unmistakably parallel dimensions of life as I know it. I have always thought of myself as an efficient worker – able to tackle many things at once. I balanced working full time and getting my MBA for goodness sake. Yet this whole motherhood thing has kicked it up…well, another notch. For the precious few hours my five week old son is asleep during the day, I face a dilemma of epic consequence and find within myself strength and wit I knew not of until very recently. He’s asleep. Do I, a.) take a much-needed nap, b.) start a load of laundry to rectify the fact that he has no clean jammies or blankets and I’ve been going commando for three days, c.) pump some breast milk to freeze so that some day in a future I can only dream of, I can leave him for several hours to pursue such luxuries as grocery shopping or checking in to an asylum, or d.) take a shower to remove the encrusted spit up that has accumulated on my right shoulder? The answer…simply, is all of the above.
First, put the baby down to sleep with all manner of unnatural assistance I have no idea how women ever lived with out – crib vibrator, iPod playing classical guitar music, white noise machine to block out all other sound, sleep positioner -- just in case he suddenly develops the ability to rollover he won’t smother himself in his organic cotton crib sheet. Then take the breast pump in the bathroom for easy access. Shower quickly, of course using 2-in-1 Pantene. Forget shaving my legs, I can’t have sex for 7 more days anyway. We’ll skip over whether or not peeing in the shower is a true time saver or just pure laziness. Then, while the milk is flowing from the hot shower, pump while brushing the teeth I have been neglecting for weeks. Wrap up in a big towel (hell, no one is home but me) and run the laundry down stairs. Because I am so efficient at all this, I can even pause here to return a few emails, upload the latest pictures to my Picasa site and MAYBE…have a quick snack. Oops. Forgot to get in the nap. Isn’t that just how it goes?
By the by, should one think I am writing all this to BRAG on my super-mommy abilities, I assure you, I am not. I’m merely presenting this as evidence of how insane my life has become. Not only can I do ALL this…but I am perfectly capable of having a ten minute conversation with a total stranger about poop. That MBA paid for itself, yes?
Another new development is the sudden acquisition of Spidey Senses. I have learned that WHILE ASLEEP I have the ability to hear the slightest alternation in the baby’s breathing pattern or shift in sleeping position. This is over the aforementioned white noise machine, crib vibrator and heater/fan (depending on if I think he MIGHT be the slightest bit hot or cold at the moment) and my snoring baby-daddy in the bed next to me. Conversely, I can also now BLOCK OUT the defcon-4 screaming fit Austin likes to have each evening as if it were sweet music for yoga and meditation. I marvel at these amazing adjustments in hearing that allow the new mother to survive in the wild. I also find it interesting that, like the girl in Clueless who’s tits predicated the weather, mine can alert me a good five minutes in advance of the hungry baby waking up from a nap. Nature once again at its most amazing -- providing me plenty of notice to get the Boppy, set up the three zillion pillows I need to use to get in to proper nursing position, fetch a new set of breast pads, and unsnap my fancy nursing tank. Such the Earth Mother am I. Another sense that has adjusted is my always keen sense of smell. Once limited to simply rotting food in the disposal and alcohol on my husband’s breath, I can now identify any number of indoor air quality issues that might adversely impact my son’s health or well-being…or SLEEP. Someone used bleach in the kitchen? Throw open the windows - stat! Who forgot to use the organic laundry detergent on these onesies? Ugh…I have to do everything around here. Did one of the cats vomit? Let the dog in to lick it up before the hacking wakes the baby.
Peter Parker my ass – try being the mother of a newborn THEN maybe we’ll make a fourth movie.
As a new mother you know you have, as they say, ‘hit your stride’ when the definition of multitasking has gone from checking emails on your PDA while attending a professional development conference to peeing in the shower. Both worthy and no doubt time-saving efforts, yet somehow evidence of two unmistakably parallel dimensions of life as I know it. I have always thought of myself as an efficient worker – able to tackle many things at once. I balanced working full time and getting my MBA for goodness sake. Yet this whole motherhood thing has kicked it up…well, another notch. For the precious few hours my five week old son is asleep during the day, I face a dilemma of epic consequence and find within myself strength and wit I knew not of until very recently. He’s asleep. Do I, a.) take a much-needed nap, b.) start a load of laundry to rectify the fact that he has no clean jammies or blankets and I’ve been going commando for three days, c.) pump some breast milk to freeze so that some day in a future I can only dream of, I can leave him for several hours to pursue such luxuries as grocery shopping or checking in to an asylum, or d.) take a shower to remove the encrusted spit up that has accumulated on my right shoulder? The answer…simply, is all of the above.
First, put the baby down to sleep with all manner of unnatural assistance I have no idea how women ever lived with out – crib vibrator, iPod playing classical guitar music, white noise machine to block out all other sound, sleep positioner -- just in case he suddenly develops the ability to rollover he won’t smother himself in his organic cotton crib sheet. Then take the breast pump in the bathroom for easy access. Shower quickly, of course using 2-in-1 Pantene. Forget shaving my legs, I can’t have sex for 7 more days anyway. We’ll skip over whether or not peeing in the shower is a true time saver or just pure laziness. Then, while the milk is flowing from the hot shower, pump while brushing the teeth I have been neglecting for weeks. Wrap up in a big towel (hell, no one is home but me) and run the laundry down stairs. Because I am so efficient at all this, I can even pause here to return a few emails, upload the latest pictures to my Picasa site and MAYBE…have a quick snack. Oops. Forgot to get in the nap. Isn’t that just how it goes?
By the by, should one think I am writing all this to BRAG on my super-mommy abilities, I assure you, I am not. I’m merely presenting this as evidence of how insane my life has become. Not only can I do ALL this…but I am perfectly capable of having a ten minute conversation with a total stranger about poop. That MBA paid for itself, yes?
Another new development is the sudden acquisition of Spidey Senses. I have learned that WHILE ASLEEP I have the ability to hear the slightest alternation in the baby’s breathing pattern or shift in sleeping position. This is over the aforementioned white noise machine, crib vibrator and heater/fan (depending on if I think he MIGHT be the slightest bit hot or cold at the moment) and my snoring baby-daddy in the bed next to me. Conversely, I can also now BLOCK OUT the defcon-4 screaming fit Austin likes to have each evening as if it were sweet music for yoga and meditation. I marvel at these amazing adjustments in hearing that allow the new mother to survive in the wild. I also find it interesting that, like the girl in Clueless who’s tits predicated the weather, mine can alert me a good five minutes in advance of the hungry baby waking up from a nap. Nature once again at its most amazing -- providing me plenty of notice to get the Boppy, set up the three zillion pillows I need to use to get in to proper nursing position, fetch a new set of breast pads, and unsnap my fancy nursing tank. Such the Earth Mother am I. Another sense that has adjusted is my always keen sense of smell. Once limited to simply rotting food in the disposal and alcohol on my husband’s breath, I can now identify any number of indoor air quality issues that might adversely impact my son’s health or well-being…or SLEEP. Someone used bleach in the kitchen? Throw open the windows - stat! Who forgot to use the organic laundry detergent on these onesies? Ugh…I have to do everything around here. Did one of the cats vomit? Let the dog in to lick it up before the hacking wakes the baby.
Peter Parker my ass – try being the mother of a newborn THEN maybe we’ll make a fourth movie.
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
New title for the blog
I can't think of a title or quote that better fits my life at this very moment. As the Johnson & Johnson commercials say in the sickly sweet voice, "having a baby changes everything". I always wondered what they were advertising there. I mean really, if there were TRUTH in advertising, no one would willingly make the choice to have children. Not that it is not worth it 100%, it is just that there is no way of knowing how MUCH things change until it is too late. The changes in our life since Austin was born have been more then mere changes...they have been changes in LATITUDE. Altering the course of our lives so much so that we need an entirely different map then the one we previously used. And yes, it is true, if we couldn't laugh we would surely be insane by now.
So in hopes that my sleep deprivation will inspire a new batch of blogging, here is a pic of Austin and the timeless lyrics of one Jimmy Buffett -- as always, providing the soundtrack to my life. Funny, the theme song used to be 'Boat Drinks'. :)
By: Jimmy Buffett: 1977
I took off for a weekend last month
Just to try and recall the whole year
All of the faces and all of the places
Wonderin where they all disappeared
I didn't ponder the question too long
I was hungry and went out for a bite
Ran into a chum with a bottle of rum
And we wound up drinkin all night
Chorus: Its these changes in latitudes, changes in attitudes
Nothing remains quite the same
With all of our running and all of our cunning
If we couldn't laugh we would all go insane
Reading departure signs in some big airport
Reminds me of the places I've been
Visions of good times that brought so much pleasure
Makes me want to go back again
If it suddenly ended tomorrow
I could somehow adjust to the fall
Good times and riches and son of a bitches
I've seen more than I can recall
Chorus: These changes in latitudes, changes in attitudes
Nothing remains quite the same
Through all of the islands and all of the highlands
If we couldn't laugh we would all go insane
I think about Paris when I'm high on red wine
I wish I could jump on a plane
So many nights I just dream of the ocean
God I wish I was sailin again
Oh, yesterdays over my shoulder
So I cant look back for too long
There's just too much to see waiting in front of me
And I know that I just cant go wrong
Chorus: With these changes in latitudes, changes in attitudes
Nothing remains quite the same
With all of my running and all of my cunning
If I couldn't laugh I just would go insane
If we couldn't laugh we just would go insane
If we weren't all crazy we would go insane
Monday, July 28, 2008
Quote of the Day
Those who would give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety. - Benjamin Franklin
I wonder what Ben Franklin would say about the way our country has handled national security in this century?
I wonder what Ben Franklin would say about the way our country has handled national security in this century?
Thursday, March 13, 2008
To Hope
by John Keats
When by my solitary hearth I sit,
And hateful thoughts enwrap my soul in gloom;
When no fair dreams before my "mind's eye" flit,
And the bare heath of life presents no bloom;
Sweet Hope, ethereal balm upon me shed,
And wave thy silver pinions o'er my head.
Whene'er I wander, at the fall of night,
Where woven boughs shut out the moon's bright ray,
Should sad Despondency my musings fright,
And frown, to drive fair Cheerfulness away,
Peep with the moon-beams through the leafy roof,
And keep that fiend Despondence far aloof.
Should Disappointment, parent of Despair,
Strive for her son to seize my careless heart;
When, like a cloud, he sits upon the air,
Preparing on his spell-bound prey to dart:
Chace him away, sweet Hope, with visage bright,
And fright him as the morning frightens night!
Whene'er the fate of those I hold most dear
Tells to my fearful breast a tale of sorrow,
O bright-eyed Hope, my morbid fancy cheer;
Let me awhile thy sweetest comforts borrow:
Thy heaven-born radiance around me shed,
And wave thy silver pinions o'er my head!
Should e'er unhappy love my bosom pain,
From cruel parents, or relentless fair;
O let me think it is not quite in vain
To sigh out sonnets to the midnight air!
Sweet Hope, ethereal balm upon me shed.
And wave thy silver pinions o'er my head!
In the long vista of the years to roll,
Let me not see our country's honour fade:
O let me see our land retain her soul,
Her pride, her freedom; and not freedom's shade.
From thy bright eyes unusual brightness shed--
Beneath thy pinions canopy my head!
Let me not see the patriot's high bequest,
Great Liberty! how great in plain attire!
With the base purple of a court oppress'd,
Bowing her head, and ready to expire:
But let me see thee stoop from heaven on wings
That fill the skies with silver glitterings!
And as, in sparkling majesty, a star
Gilds the bright summit of some gloomy cloud;
Brightening the half veil'd face of heaven afar:
So, when dark thoughts my boding spirit shroud,
Sweet Hope, celestial influence round me shed,
Waving thy silver pinions o'er my head.
When by my solitary hearth I sit,
And hateful thoughts enwrap my soul in gloom;
When no fair dreams before my "mind's eye" flit,
And the bare heath of life presents no bloom;
Sweet Hope, ethereal balm upon me shed,
And wave thy silver pinions o'er my head.
Whene'er I wander, at the fall of night,
Where woven boughs shut out the moon's bright ray,
Should sad Despondency my musings fright,
And frown, to drive fair Cheerfulness away,
Peep with the moon-beams through the leafy roof,
And keep that fiend Despondence far aloof.
Should Disappointment, parent of Despair,
Strive for her son to seize my careless heart;
When, like a cloud, he sits upon the air,
Preparing on his spell-bound prey to dart:
Chace him away, sweet Hope, with visage bright,
And fright him as the morning frightens night!
Whene'er the fate of those I hold most dear
Tells to my fearful breast a tale of sorrow,
O bright-eyed Hope, my morbid fancy cheer;
Let me awhile thy sweetest comforts borrow:
Thy heaven-born radiance around me shed,
And wave thy silver pinions o'er my head!
Should e'er unhappy love my bosom pain,
From cruel parents, or relentless fair;
O let me think it is not quite in vain
To sigh out sonnets to the midnight air!
Sweet Hope, ethereal balm upon me shed.
And wave thy silver pinions o'er my head!
In the long vista of the years to roll,
Let me not see our country's honour fade:
O let me see our land retain her soul,
Her pride, her freedom; and not freedom's shade.
From thy bright eyes unusual brightness shed--
Beneath thy pinions canopy my head!
Let me not see the patriot's high bequest,
Great Liberty! how great in plain attire!
With the base purple of a court oppress'd,
Bowing her head, and ready to expire:
But let me see thee stoop from heaven on wings
That fill the skies with silver glitterings!
And as, in sparkling majesty, a star
Gilds the bright summit of some gloomy cloud;
Brightening the half veil'd face of heaven afar:
So, when dark thoughts my boding spirit shroud,
Sweet Hope, celestial influence round me shed,
Waving thy silver pinions o'er my head.
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
Conflicted
"I arise in the morning torn between a desire to improve the world and a desire to enjoy the world. This makes it hard to plan the day." E. B. White
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
Change
You would think that with so much going on in life I'd have a lot to say. But it just has not happened that way. If anything, I feel more reserved and unable to find my voice among all the other noise around me. Everyone has an opinion and there are so many other people's feelings to consider that I feel selfish taking the time to work out my own thoughts and emotions. It is funny that the things that are causing me anguish and heartache right now are things I NEVER expected to be an issue during this time in my life. Things that should bring comfort and hope and peace bring nothing but stress and anger and resentment. I feel powerless to change it too. Not a good feeling to have during a time I need to feel empowered and strong and confident. But I guess that is just how things work out sometimes. New experiences force me to look for new sources of positive energy in my life and teach me to let go of old attachments and expectations. I'm trying to keep it light...and not give all the negativity more power then it deserves. That is easier said then done. I need an outlet that is my own. Maybe it is time to change this blog. I love it, but feel it has become less then authentic due to the fact I now write to an "audience" and temper my thoughts and feelings in fear of their reactions. That is NOT why I started this.
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
So I'm a little SLOW...
I know it is been, well a LONG time since I posted. But here I am with a photo gallery of our recent trip to Vegas to see Jimmy Buffett. OK, so what if it was in October?...it really wasn't THAT long ago! At least I'm trying...that has to count for something. Most of you out there (hem hem..Shel, Brooke, Chris, Shannon & my FAMILY) have not updated your blogs since the last ice age! So get with it already!
Enjoy the pics: http://picasaweb.google.com/skcollins1977/VegasBaby
Enjoy the pics: http://picasaweb.google.com/skcollins1977/VegasBaby
Monday, July 02, 2007
There Will Come a Day
There will come a day when we realize that most of the things we spend our energy and resources on don’t really matter at all. I don’t know when, but I know this day will come. A family member will get cancer, a loved one will die, a child will get sick, a natural disaster will shake our world...and in the midst of something we don’t think we can handle, we will catch a brief glimpse of another world; one in which priorities are based on eternity, not on temporary comfort or gain. Why, in our “civilized” world does it always take a tragedy to shake us in to being AWAKE to life? Why can we not just CHOOSE to adopt that perspective each day?
We take so much for granted in this society. Clean water, health, safety, peace, abundance of food, education...the list goes on and on and is made up of things that the majority of the population of this world does NOT have. However, since we have to worry about something, we use our energy to combat cellulite on our bodies, depletion of our bank accounts, weeds in our yards, dirt on our cars and boredom in our lives. We have eradicated all “natural” causes of death in our society that other countries in the world are plagued (literally) by – there is no polio, malaria, small pox, wide-spread starvation here. So we’ve replaced those too with “lifestyle” causes of death – heart disease from eating processed, fatty foods and not being physically active or lung cancer from continuing to smoke when we are 100% sure that it will result in death. We create a crisis when none actually exist.
I do it too. Every day. The things I spend my time and energy on are seldom things that have any eternal value. If I could get back every minute of time and ounce of emotional energy I spent worrying about being “fat” or go back and do all the things I chose not to do because of that, I’d probably be living a quarter of my life over again. Couple that with all the time I have spent fretting over my house being clean, the laundry being done and who knows how much time I’d have to spend on things that REALLY matter: loving my family, following GOD’s plan for my life, making this world a better place to live and ENJOYING this life while I have it.
There is SO MUCH to do in this world – life to be lived and enjoyed and work to be done. God put all this beauty here for us to enjoy and yet we sit in our climate controlled houses and watch other people travel on TV. We have been given the resources, as individuals and as a nation, to help people and help the world and yet the most involved we ever get is reading the news and saying “how sad, someone should do something”.
Well, what ELSE are you doing with your time and energy and resources that is so important? Why not US? Why not NOW? I know I am not going to get to the end of my life and wish I would have done more laundry, been a size 6, pulled more weeds or had a nicer house. I am going to wish with all my soul that I would have told my family I loved them more, been out in God’s nature as often as I could have, given more to help those in need, and left the planet a better place then I found it.
I want to believe that the choice is ours and that we CAN live this way with out waiting for something terrible to shake our core. It is about making the best possible choice you can at every moment. Not just the “best” for you, but the best for the world. One question can be your guide: Is this the best use of the resources I have been given? Resources like time, energy, money, strength, love, compassion...are not to be wasted. If I chose to spend my morning being depressed about being what I think is overweight - is that solving ANYHTING? If I see a story about global warming and think “oh well, I can’t do anything to help” – are things ever going to change?
I was reading a book by the Dali Lama recently and he spoke to the issue of worry and problems. He said, “If the solution to the problem is such that it can be remedied, then there is no need to worry about it.” The appropriate action is to seek solution. To me this means if I am faced with a problem and I know there is a solution, I am to take action – take the next logical step towards resolution. Alternately, the Dali Lama said, “if there is not way out, no solution, no possibility of resolution, then there is also no point in being worried about it, because you can’t do anything about it anyway.” Simple, right? Sure it is...until you TRY IT.
Most of the problems we face, personally or collectively, have a solution. That is what is amazing about us humans – we have been given the ability to effect our world. Unfortunately, this means our impact may be positive OR negative. Either way, we are powerful and must use the resources given us to do the most good. DO THE MOST GOOD. Try it. With each choice you make ask yourself if you are using the resources you have been given to do the most good – for your self, your family, your community, the planet. I think you’ll find that there is much, much less to worry about.
(I’ll try it too)
We take so much for granted in this society. Clean water, health, safety, peace, abundance of food, education...the list goes on and on and is made up of things that the majority of the population of this world does NOT have. However, since we have to worry about something, we use our energy to combat cellulite on our bodies, depletion of our bank accounts, weeds in our yards, dirt on our cars and boredom in our lives. We have eradicated all “natural” causes of death in our society that other countries in the world are plagued (literally) by – there is no polio, malaria, small pox, wide-spread starvation here. So we’ve replaced those too with “lifestyle” causes of death – heart disease from eating processed, fatty foods and not being physically active or lung cancer from continuing to smoke when we are 100% sure that it will result in death. We create a crisis when none actually exist.
I do it too. Every day. The things I spend my time and energy on are seldom things that have any eternal value. If I could get back every minute of time and ounce of emotional energy I spent worrying about being “fat” or go back and do all the things I chose not to do because of that, I’d probably be living a quarter of my life over again. Couple that with all the time I have spent fretting over my house being clean, the laundry being done and who knows how much time I’d have to spend on things that REALLY matter: loving my family, following GOD’s plan for my life, making this world a better place to live and ENJOYING this life while I have it.
There is SO MUCH to do in this world – life to be lived and enjoyed and work to be done. God put all this beauty here for us to enjoy and yet we sit in our climate controlled houses and watch other people travel on TV. We have been given the resources, as individuals and as a nation, to help people and help the world and yet the most involved we ever get is reading the news and saying “how sad, someone should do something”.
Well, what ELSE are you doing with your time and energy and resources that is so important? Why not US? Why not NOW? I know I am not going to get to the end of my life and wish I would have done more laundry, been a size 6, pulled more weeds or had a nicer house. I am going to wish with all my soul that I would have told my family I loved them more, been out in God’s nature as often as I could have, given more to help those in need, and left the planet a better place then I found it.
I want to believe that the choice is ours and that we CAN live this way with out waiting for something terrible to shake our core. It is about making the best possible choice you can at every moment. Not just the “best” for you, but the best for the world. One question can be your guide: Is this the best use of the resources I have been given? Resources like time, energy, money, strength, love, compassion...are not to be wasted. If I chose to spend my morning being depressed about being what I think is overweight - is that solving ANYHTING? If I see a story about global warming and think “oh well, I can’t do anything to help” – are things ever going to change?
I was reading a book by the Dali Lama recently and he spoke to the issue of worry and problems. He said, “If the solution to the problem is such that it can be remedied, then there is no need to worry about it.” The appropriate action is to seek solution. To me this means if I am faced with a problem and I know there is a solution, I am to take action – take the next logical step towards resolution. Alternately, the Dali Lama said, “if there is not way out, no solution, no possibility of resolution, then there is also no point in being worried about it, because you can’t do anything about it anyway.” Simple, right? Sure it is...until you TRY IT.
Most of the problems we face, personally or collectively, have a solution. That is what is amazing about us humans – we have been given the ability to effect our world. Unfortunately, this means our impact may be positive OR negative. Either way, we are powerful and must use the resources given us to do the most good. DO THE MOST GOOD. Try it. With each choice you make ask yourself if you are using the resources you have been given to do the most good – for your self, your family, your community, the planet. I think you’ll find that there is much, much less to worry about.
(I’ll try it too)
Wednesday, June 06, 2007
May the Force be with you...
I know it is such a silly picture and pretty much anyone with an email address has seen it...but it makes me laugh EVERY time so I had to post it. Something about the teeny tiny Light Sabers is hilarious to me. I wonder if they make the same noise and the real ones? We recently had a Star Wars watching marathon at our house in honor of the 30th anniversary of A New Hope. It amazes me how timeless those movies are. Classic stories, familiar archetypes and enduring lessons. They may very well end up being the fairy tales and mythology of our modern era; they are certainly a cross-generational, cross- cultural common language. An interesting phenomenon to be sure.
And squirrels with teeny Light Sabers? Classic. :)
Wednesday, May 30, 2007
It’s Five O’Clock Somewhere
Not here...but SOMEWHERE. I wish I were there. Being stuck at work during the summer is just horrible to me. It is as if the world outside the window is going on with out me. There is wind, and sun, and water, and smells, and sounds…in here there is nothing. It is always the same temperature and all I hear is the humming of the air conditioner and buzzing of the florescent lights. It smells like mildew and stale coffee and old ladies. I bought a tropical breeze plug-in, but it doesn’t help and I am certainly not fooled into thinking I am in Belize somewhere.
Some days (oh, like TODAY) I feel I’m just sitting here in this chair getting older and fatter and my life is not making a difference at all. Do other people feel like this or is there something wrong with just me? I keep reminding myself to be thankful I have a job, live in a safe place, have food and shelter, people who love me and every resource available to me to live a wonderful life. And I am truly grateful for that. I don’t want to be the Ugly American here and complain about living this easy life. I know that life is a hardship I can not even begin to imagine for most of the people in this world. But does that honestly make me change my perspective? A little I guess, but I still can’t help questioning the authenticity and value of the life I am living. I was born a white American woman because that is what God wanted me to be. I have all of these things because if Him. I just don’t know what the heck I am supposed to be doing with it all. Sometimes when I read the news I feel guilty for my state in life. So many people have so little and here I am getting FAT from eating organic food and complaining about being in a safe air-conditioned building working a job at which I am in no danger (if you don’t count the asbestos in this old building).
So why do I live for 5:00? Why can I think of nothing more then what I'd be doing if I were not HERE? Ugh.
Well, this was depressing to write...so I am sure it was ever so much fun to READ. Sorry about that. If you need a smile, just go back to the post with the Jimmy Buffett pics. I'll come around and write something witty soon.
Some days (oh, like TODAY) I feel I’m just sitting here in this chair getting older and fatter and my life is not making a difference at all. Do other people feel like this or is there something wrong with just me? I keep reminding myself to be thankful I have a job, live in a safe place, have food and shelter, people who love me and every resource available to me to live a wonderful life. And I am truly grateful for that. I don’t want to be the Ugly American here and complain about living this easy life. I know that life is a hardship I can not even begin to imagine for most of the people in this world. But does that honestly make me change my perspective? A little I guess, but I still can’t help questioning the authenticity and value of the life I am living. I was born a white American woman because that is what God wanted me to be. I have all of these things because if Him. I just don’t know what the heck I am supposed to be doing with it all. Sometimes when I read the news I feel guilty for my state in life. So many people have so little and here I am getting FAT from eating organic food and complaining about being in a safe air-conditioned building working a job at which I am in no danger (if you don’t count the asbestos in this old building).
So why do I live for 5:00? Why can I think of nothing more then what I'd be doing if I were not HERE? Ugh.
Well, this was depressing to write...so I am sure it was ever so much fun to READ. Sorry about that. If you need a smile, just go back to the post with the Jimmy Buffett pics. I'll come around and write something witty soon.
Sunday, April 29, 2007
Wednesday, March 07, 2007
Who is 30??
Who says that 30 year olds can't have any fun? Since my birthday falls on Spring Break, the girls at work gave me an early party today...complete with Harry Potter plates, tablecloths and cups! I even got my own wizard hat, glasses and a light-up wand! It was a little funny explaining all this to our superintendent...but hey, if you are a true Potterphile, you embrace it and move on with life! Here is a pic for your amusement.
Thursday, March 01, 2007
Even Charlie Knows!
I wish I could give credit to who ever created this...but I can't. It was forwarded to me via email. However, it was way too funny not to post. I love the social commentary it touches on...the inferences to the absurdity of pop culture. I love that even Charlie Brown is "bringing sexy back" and that our beloved Snoopy is now a pseudo-gangsta. And the fact that it is just damn funny sure doesn't hurt.
Tuesday, February 20, 2007
...And Life Moved On
Excerpt from Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas: A Savage Journey to the Heart of the American Dream by Hunter S. Thompson
"San Francisco in the middle sixties was a very special time and place to be a part of. Maybe it meant something. Maybe not, in the long run . . . but no explanation, no mix of words or music or memories can touch that sense of knowing that you were there and alive in that corner of time and the world. Whatever it meant. . . .
History is hard to know, because of all the hired bullshit, but even without being sure of "history" it seems entirely reasonable to think that every now and then the energy of a whole generation comes to a head in a long fine flash, for reasons that nobody really understands at the time -- and which never explain, in retrospect, what actually happened.
My central memory of that time seems to hang on one or five or maybe forty nights -- or very early mornings -- when I left the Fillmore half-crazy and, instead of going home, aimed the big 650 Lightning across the Bay Bridge at a hundred miles an hour wearing L. L. Bean shorts and a Butte sheepherder's jacket . . . booming through the Treasure Island tunnel at the lights of Oakland and Berkeley and Richmond, not quite sure which turn-off to take when I got to the other end (always stalling at the toll-gate, too twisted to find neutral while I fumbled for change) . . . but being absolutely certain that no matter which way I went I would come to a place where people were just as high and wild as I was: No doubt at all about that. . . .
There was madness in any direction, at any hour. If not across the Bay, then up the Golden Gate or down 101 to Los Altos or La Honda. . . . You could strike sparks anywhere. There was a fantastic universal sense that whatever we were doing was right, that we were winning. . . .
And that, I think, was the handle -- that sense of inevitable victory over the forces of Old and Evil. Not in any mean or military sense; we didn't need that. Our energy would simply prevail. There was no point in fighting -- on our side or theirs. We had all the momentum; we were riding the crest of a high and beautiful wave. . . .So now, less than five years later, you can go up on a steep hill in Las Vegas and look West, and with the right kind of eyes you can almost see the high-water mark -- that place where the wave finally broke and rolled back."
That passage is always beautiful to me -- the imagery is timeless. It stands out on this particular day for a lot of reasons. First of all because today is the anniversary of Thompson's death. Something I still find very sad. I guess I just wish he'd had more to say. I am for anyone who stirs the pot of conventional thinking and makes people question. This segment always speaks to me when I think about the passage of time. Things that are so real and so true at one moment...and then are over the next. The temporary nature of life is sometimes overwhelming while at the same time acting as inspiration to live each day as authentically as possible. Life is going to keep moving -- regardless if we are on board or not. So we might as well buy the ticket ...and take the ride.
"San Francisco in the middle sixties was a very special time and place to be a part of. Maybe it meant something. Maybe not, in the long run . . . but no explanation, no mix of words or music or memories can touch that sense of knowing that you were there and alive in that corner of time and the world. Whatever it meant. . . .
History is hard to know, because of all the hired bullshit, but even without being sure of "history" it seems entirely reasonable to think that every now and then the energy of a whole generation comes to a head in a long fine flash, for reasons that nobody really understands at the time -- and which never explain, in retrospect, what actually happened.
My central memory of that time seems to hang on one or five or maybe forty nights -- or very early mornings -- when I left the Fillmore half-crazy and, instead of going home, aimed the big 650 Lightning across the Bay Bridge at a hundred miles an hour wearing L. L. Bean shorts and a Butte sheepherder's jacket . . . booming through the Treasure Island tunnel at the lights of Oakland and Berkeley and Richmond, not quite sure which turn-off to take when I got to the other end (always stalling at the toll-gate, too twisted to find neutral while I fumbled for change) . . . but being absolutely certain that no matter which way I went I would come to a place where people were just as high and wild as I was: No doubt at all about that. . . .
There was madness in any direction, at any hour. If not across the Bay, then up the Golden Gate or down 101 to Los Altos or La Honda. . . . You could strike sparks anywhere. There was a fantastic universal sense that whatever we were doing was right, that we were winning. . . .
And that, I think, was the handle -- that sense of inevitable victory over the forces of Old and Evil. Not in any mean or military sense; we didn't need that. Our energy would simply prevail. There was no point in fighting -- on our side or theirs. We had all the momentum; we were riding the crest of a high and beautiful wave. . . .So now, less than five years later, you can go up on a steep hill in Las Vegas and look West, and with the right kind of eyes you can almost see the high-water mark -- that place where the wave finally broke and rolled back."
That passage is always beautiful to me -- the imagery is timeless. It stands out on this particular day for a lot of reasons. First of all because today is the anniversary of Thompson's death. Something I still find very sad. I guess I just wish he'd had more to say. I am for anyone who stirs the pot of conventional thinking and makes people question. This segment always speaks to me when I think about the passage of time. Things that are so real and so true at one moment...and then are over the next. The temporary nature of life is sometimes overwhelming while at the same time acting as inspiration to live each day as authentically as possible. Life is going to keep moving -- regardless if we are on board or not. So we might as well buy the ticket ...and take the ride.
Friday, February 09, 2007
The Tyranny of Size
This was just worth posting the whole article rather then just a link. I think of the battles I fight with myself daily over these issues and can NOT imagine what girls growing up today will have to deal with they are in their twenties. It reminds me that every single woman needs to work against this with every single word they say to the girls in their lives. They ARE listening and it is our responsibility to send right and true messages about beauty.
Why Skinny Models Could Be Making Us Fat
We know that the trend toward super-thin models is pushing some of them to go on potentially deadly diets. What's it doing to the rest of us?
WEB EXCLUSIVE
By Jessica Bennett, Sarah Childress and Susanna Schrobsdorff
Newsweek
Feb. 8, 2007 - The specter of dangerously thin models has raised its beautiful, lolling head once again, this time at New York's Fashion Week, which ends Friday. Stung by negative publicity about boney apparitions on the catwalks, the fashion industry invited eating-disorder experts to an unprecedented symposium on the subject in the tents at Bryant Park. It was quite a spectacle. The press was regaled with tales of models living on lethally small amounts of lettuce and Diet Coke. The fashionistas declared that super thin was now "out" and promised to keep a better eye on the young waifs. But no one in the U.S. clothing biz seems eager to impose minimum weight guidelines on models, as some European shows have done. Diane von Furstenberg, president of the Council of Fashion Designers of America (CFDA), added fuel to the fire when she recently told a reporter that model weigh-ins in New York would happen "over my dead body."
While the travails of the thin and beautiful almost always make for good copy, we should remember that only about 1 percent of the American population is anorexic, while nearly two thirds of adults are overweight or obese, according to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. So it's not as if skinny models have inspired an epidemic of slimness. In fact, the real danger may be that the contrast between the girls on the catwalks and the girls at the mall is creating an atmosphere ripe for binge dieting and the kind of unhealthy eating habits that ultimately result in weight gain, not loss. "You always [have to] look at the discrepancy between the real and the ideal," says Cynthia Bulik, a clinical psychologist who heads the eating-disorders program at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. "If [kids] see themselves gaining weight and then they see these ultra-thin models, the discrepancy between how they see themselves in the mirror and how they feel they have to look is bigger. And that can prompt more extreme behaviors."
Unfortunately, that gap between the ordinary and the elite is growing rapidly. As American women have gotten heavier, models have gotten thinner and taller. Twenty-five years ago, the average female model weighed 8 percent less than the average American woman, according to researchers. Today, models weigh about 23 percent less than the average woman. Models are also leggier than before. Usually about 5 feet 10 inches tall, they are a good five inches taller than they were 10 years ago. Meanwhile, a typical woman is about 5 feet 4 inches and weighs 155 pounds, according to a 2004 SizeUSA study. The trend is enough to make any woman feel like a hobbit in comparison to what they're seeing in magazines.
But here's the rub: thanks to technology, often not even the models themselves can compare to their portfolios. Increasingly, photos for print are enhanced and perfected to an astonishing degree. Not only are moles, acne and subtle facial hair erased from already pretty faces, but retouchers are routinely asked by editors and advertisers to enlarge eyes, trim normal-size ears, fill in hairlines, straighten teeth and lengthen the already-narrow necks, waists and legs of 18-year-old beauties. "We're always stretching the models' legs and slimming their thighs," says a photo retoucher who works for a high-end Manhattan agency. In some cases, hands, feet or even legs are replaced in photos when the subject's parts don't add up to a perfect whole.
"Sometimes I feel a little like Frankenstein," says the retoucher, who would only speak anonymously because of the potential for professional backlash. The irony, she adds, is that the models and actresses pictured have usually have already been through hours of hair styling and makeup - including body makeup - to remove the slightest blemish. Yes, you heard that right, even after all of that, a 5-foot-10, 110-pound model still does not have legs that are long or skinny enough to suit some advertisers and fashion editrixes.
One might argue that photo alteration has been around for eons, but what is new is the industry shift from film to digital media about four years ago. Now it's easier, faster and more routine to clean up and "perfect" faces and figures. The doctored images are so pervasive that our eyes are perhaps becoming too accustomed to them. "The result is a culture of kids who are being socialized to unrealistic images, who need to learn to separate the real from the fabricated," says Cornell University historian Joan Jacobs Brumberg, the author of "The Body Project" (Vintage), which looks at the diaries of teenage girls from the 1820s through the 1980s. "Girls internalize this form of self- criticism and say, 'I don't look like that.' But in reality, nobody looks like that."
How do these unrealistic portrayals affect the number of people with eating disorders? It's hard to say. The statistics are notoriously difficult to track because of the shame surrounding these diseases. Experts say that sufferers are influenced by a combination of genetics and environmental triggers. But even if no one factor is to blame, for some of the 10 million women and one million men in the United States who struggle with anorexia and bulimia (and the 25 million more who suffer from binge-eating disorder), what they see in the media can, in some cases, have a pivotal impact. "Genes load the gun, environment pulls the trigger, and right now the fashion industry has their finger on the trigger," says Bulik.
Particularly disturbing are indications that the quest for perfection is reaching into younger age groups. Kids form their body images almost as soon as they can form words, and girls are now thinking negatively about their shapes in grammar school. Today, 42 percent of first- to third-grade girls want to be thinner, while 81 percent of 10-year-olds are afraid of getting fat, according to a 2004 global study by the Dove "Real Beauty" campaign. "What we've seen more and more is an increasingly narrow image of beauty, not just completely defined by physical appearance, but a particular body type "tall, thin, maybe blond, with very little diversity," says Nancy Etcoff, a Harvard psychology professor and author of "Survival of the Prettiest" (Random House). The effects of that are striking. The Dove study found that just 2 percent of women and girls said they would describe themselves as beautiful, while two thirds said they avoided basic activities on days they felt unattractive. Those activities ranged from going to the beach or a party to showing up for work or school -- even voicing an opinion.
The fact that we're making the body the central focus of our lives is no accident, says Brumberg. Rather, it's "a symptom of historical changes that are only now beginning to be understood," she writes. So what are those changes? To start, there has been a centurylong shift from concern for good work to concern for good looks, says Brumberg. And while in the 1920s, for example, girls started becoming conscious of celebrity culture -- and, she says, for the first time using the word "image" -- today's obsession with personal appearance is largely a result of the technology that allows us to focus on it. "[Technological] inventions increased our level of self-scrutiny," she says. "Mirrors, movies, scales, the modern bathroom. You have to have a certain environment for that obsessive concern."
Of course, environment affects each woman differently. Influences on body image range from our families and school to our peer groups or media consumption -- even whether or not we take part in sports. For longtime model Carre Otis, that environment was fashion and the pressure it placed on her to be thin encouraged a nearly two-decade battle with a host of unhealthy habits. Now 38 and healthy, Otis (who is 5-foot-10 and at times weighed as little as 100 pounds) says she worries about the pressures her young daughter will someday face. "We're living in a culture that's so physically oriented," she says. "It's really dangerous for young girls to operate under the assumption that models, in general, are the majority."
But the majority image isn't what the public wants these days, according to the fashion elites. "Fat doesn't sell fashion," says Imogen Edwards-Jones, a journalist and author of "Fashion Babylon," an insider's look at the industry. "People don't fantasize about being a size 16 -- they fantasize about being a size 8." So even if the public can't fit into (much less afford) a size 0 designer dress, they'll probably buy a magazine with a size 0 model wearing that dress. "It's a presentation of this fantasy, and you buy into that," says Steven Kolb, the executive director of CFDA.
Of course, that can always change. Curves were cool in the '80s (remember Cindy Crawford?) and 90s (Anna Nicole Smith). And the industry will likely swing back around to embrace them again. Already, the faces on the catwalks in New York this week are looking somewhat less gaunt. But it doesn't look like it's going to get any easier for women to convince themselves, or their daughters, to stop looking for the model in the mirror.
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/17051511/site/newsweek/
Why Skinny Models Could Be Making Us Fat
We know that the trend toward super-thin models is pushing some of them to go on potentially deadly diets. What's it doing to the rest of us?
WEB EXCLUSIVE
By Jessica Bennett, Sarah Childress and Susanna Schrobsdorff
Newsweek
Feb. 8, 2007 - The specter of dangerously thin models has raised its beautiful, lolling head once again, this time at New York's Fashion Week, which ends Friday. Stung by negative publicity about boney apparitions on the catwalks, the fashion industry invited eating-disorder experts to an unprecedented symposium on the subject in the tents at Bryant Park. It was quite a spectacle. The press was regaled with tales of models living on lethally small amounts of lettuce and Diet Coke. The fashionistas declared that super thin was now "out" and promised to keep a better eye on the young waifs. But no one in the U.S. clothing biz seems eager to impose minimum weight guidelines on models, as some European shows have done. Diane von Furstenberg, president of the Council of Fashion Designers of America (CFDA), added fuel to the fire when she recently told a reporter that model weigh-ins in New York would happen "over my dead body."
While the travails of the thin and beautiful almost always make for good copy, we should remember that only about 1 percent of the American population is anorexic, while nearly two thirds of adults are overweight or obese, according to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. So it's not as if skinny models have inspired an epidemic of slimness. In fact, the real danger may be that the contrast between the girls on the catwalks and the girls at the mall is creating an atmosphere ripe for binge dieting and the kind of unhealthy eating habits that ultimately result in weight gain, not loss. "You always [have to] look at the discrepancy between the real and the ideal," says Cynthia Bulik, a clinical psychologist who heads the eating-disorders program at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. "If [kids] see themselves gaining weight and then they see these ultra-thin models, the discrepancy between how they see themselves in the mirror and how they feel they have to look is bigger. And that can prompt more extreme behaviors."
Unfortunately, that gap between the ordinary and the elite is growing rapidly. As American women have gotten heavier, models have gotten thinner and taller. Twenty-five years ago, the average female model weighed 8 percent less than the average American woman, according to researchers. Today, models weigh about 23 percent less than the average woman. Models are also leggier than before. Usually about 5 feet 10 inches tall, they are a good five inches taller than they were 10 years ago. Meanwhile, a typical woman is about 5 feet 4 inches and weighs 155 pounds, according to a 2004 SizeUSA study. The trend is enough to make any woman feel like a hobbit in comparison to what they're seeing in magazines.
But here's the rub: thanks to technology, often not even the models themselves can compare to their portfolios. Increasingly, photos for print are enhanced and perfected to an astonishing degree. Not only are moles, acne and subtle facial hair erased from already pretty faces, but retouchers are routinely asked by editors and advertisers to enlarge eyes, trim normal-size ears, fill in hairlines, straighten teeth and lengthen the already-narrow necks, waists and legs of 18-year-old beauties. "We're always stretching the models' legs and slimming their thighs," says a photo retoucher who works for a high-end Manhattan agency. In some cases, hands, feet or even legs are replaced in photos when the subject's parts don't add up to a perfect whole.
"Sometimes I feel a little like Frankenstein," says the retoucher, who would only speak anonymously because of the potential for professional backlash. The irony, she adds, is that the models and actresses pictured have usually have already been through hours of hair styling and makeup - including body makeup - to remove the slightest blemish. Yes, you heard that right, even after all of that, a 5-foot-10, 110-pound model still does not have legs that are long or skinny enough to suit some advertisers and fashion editrixes.
One might argue that photo alteration has been around for eons, but what is new is the industry shift from film to digital media about four years ago. Now it's easier, faster and more routine to clean up and "perfect" faces and figures. The doctored images are so pervasive that our eyes are perhaps becoming too accustomed to them. "The result is a culture of kids who are being socialized to unrealistic images, who need to learn to separate the real from the fabricated," says Cornell University historian Joan Jacobs Brumberg, the author of "The Body Project" (Vintage), which looks at the diaries of teenage girls from the 1820s through the 1980s. "Girls internalize this form of self- criticism and say, 'I don't look like that.' But in reality, nobody looks like that."
How do these unrealistic portrayals affect the number of people with eating disorders? It's hard to say. The statistics are notoriously difficult to track because of the shame surrounding these diseases. Experts say that sufferers are influenced by a combination of genetics and environmental triggers. But even if no one factor is to blame, for some of the 10 million women and one million men in the United States who struggle with anorexia and bulimia (and the 25 million more who suffer from binge-eating disorder), what they see in the media can, in some cases, have a pivotal impact. "Genes load the gun, environment pulls the trigger, and right now the fashion industry has their finger on the trigger," says Bulik.
Particularly disturbing are indications that the quest for perfection is reaching into younger age groups. Kids form their body images almost as soon as they can form words, and girls are now thinking negatively about their shapes in grammar school. Today, 42 percent of first- to third-grade girls want to be thinner, while 81 percent of 10-year-olds are afraid of getting fat, according to a 2004 global study by the Dove "Real Beauty" campaign. "What we've seen more and more is an increasingly narrow image of beauty, not just completely defined by physical appearance, but a particular body type "tall, thin, maybe blond, with very little diversity," says Nancy Etcoff, a Harvard psychology professor and author of "Survival of the Prettiest" (Random House). The effects of that are striking. The Dove study found that just 2 percent of women and girls said they would describe themselves as beautiful, while two thirds said they avoided basic activities on days they felt unattractive. Those activities ranged from going to the beach or a party to showing up for work or school -- even voicing an opinion.
The fact that we're making the body the central focus of our lives is no accident, says Brumberg. Rather, it's "a symptom of historical changes that are only now beginning to be understood," she writes. So what are those changes? To start, there has been a centurylong shift from concern for good work to concern for good looks, says Brumberg. And while in the 1920s, for example, girls started becoming conscious of celebrity culture -- and, she says, for the first time using the word "image" -- today's obsession with personal appearance is largely a result of the technology that allows us to focus on it. "[Technological] inventions increased our level of self-scrutiny," she says. "Mirrors, movies, scales, the modern bathroom. You have to have a certain environment for that obsessive concern."
Of course, environment affects each woman differently. Influences on body image range from our families and school to our peer groups or media consumption -- even whether or not we take part in sports. For longtime model Carre Otis, that environment was fashion and the pressure it placed on her to be thin encouraged a nearly two-decade battle with a host of unhealthy habits. Now 38 and healthy, Otis (who is 5-foot-10 and at times weighed as little as 100 pounds) says she worries about the pressures her young daughter will someday face. "We're living in a culture that's so physically oriented," she says. "It's really dangerous for young girls to operate under the assumption that models, in general, are the majority."
But the majority image isn't what the public wants these days, according to the fashion elites. "Fat doesn't sell fashion," says Imogen Edwards-Jones, a journalist and author of "Fashion Babylon," an insider's look at the industry. "People don't fantasize about being a size 16 -- they fantasize about being a size 8." So even if the public can't fit into (much less afford) a size 0 designer dress, they'll probably buy a magazine with a size 0 model wearing that dress. "It's a presentation of this fantasy, and you buy into that," says Steven Kolb, the executive director of CFDA.
Of course, that can always change. Curves were cool in the '80s (remember Cindy Crawford?) and 90s (Anna Nicole Smith). And the industry will likely swing back around to embrace them again. Already, the faces on the catwalks in New York this week are looking somewhat less gaunt. But it doesn't look like it's going to get any easier for women to convince themselves, or their daughters, to stop looking for the model in the mirror.
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/17051511/site/newsweek/
Thursday, January 18, 2007
Best Week Ever
Other than a tribute to the fun & kicky VH1 instant pop-culture history show...that is what I am having! The best week ever. There has been a winter storm moving across the country this week that has managed (gasp!) to make it all the way down to Texas. AND as of today, it does not look like it is over (more on the way!). First of all, it is important to note how infrequently there is any sort of frozen or even half-frozen precipitation in Central Texas. It is like the proverbial hen’s teeth...very rare and most difficult to come across. So when it DOES happen not only are we ill-prepared personally (“Coats!? What for?”), but our cities are not the best at getting out the sand to make the roads passable. In fact I think the sum total of sand for this type of occasion is in the mayor’s grandson’s sandbox – we weren’t using it anyway, right? Couple that with the fact that the way some people look at porn is the way Texans watch inclimate weather and you, my friend, have the makings for a truly wonderful week.
I am not sure what it is, but around here if there is a storm, we put the kids to bed, turn off the lights and turn the volume way down on the TV to watch the Weather Channel. It’s erotic. All those colors on the screen that we never see, the anticipation and excitement surrounding a front... it is almost more then the typical Texan can stand!
On top of all this hedonistic goodness is the crowning jewel of a Texas winter storm: school closings. Texas ISD’s will close school for even the slightest hint of a flurry in the air. Sure, there is the concern of safety of all the kiddos on buses. It is a known fact that our roads will inevitably suck and that NO ONE here knows how to drive when it is like this. No, not even people who move form the north and think we are over-reacting. They can keep it together until they see what looks like a street with snow on it – “no problem, I’m from Cleveland” – only to realize too late that we do EVERYTING better in Texas and that pretty patch of snow is only there to mask a big ole’ mess of sleet and frozen rain that is all but impassable. So yes, we are concerned about keeping people safe and THAT is why the schools are closed. That...and everyone has to get home and watch weather porn. It’s a beautiful thing.
So that has been my week – no work and lots of erotic weather. During the times over the last few days in which we actually had POWER (another story) we were glued to the Doppler. Sad? Perhaps. Strange? Sure. But very, very FUN.
That that is what I am having...the BEST WEEK EVER!
I am not sure what it is, but around here if there is a storm, we put the kids to bed, turn off the lights and turn the volume way down on the TV to watch the Weather Channel. It’s erotic. All those colors on the screen that we never see, the anticipation and excitement surrounding a front... it is almost more then the typical Texan can stand!
On top of all this hedonistic goodness is the crowning jewel of a Texas winter storm: school closings. Texas ISD’s will close school for even the slightest hint of a flurry in the air. Sure, there is the concern of safety of all the kiddos on buses. It is a known fact that our roads will inevitably suck and that NO ONE here knows how to drive when it is like this. No, not even people who move form the north and think we are over-reacting. They can keep it together until they see what looks like a street with snow on it – “no problem, I’m from Cleveland” – only to realize too late that we do EVERYTING better in Texas and that pretty patch of snow is only there to mask a big ole’ mess of sleet and frozen rain that is all but impassable. So yes, we are concerned about keeping people safe and THAT is why the schools are closed. That...and everyone has to get home and watch weather porn. It’s a beautiful thing.
So that has been my week – no work and lots of erotic weather. During the times over the last few days in which we actually had POWER (another story) we were glued to the Doppler. Sad? Perhaps. Strange? Sure. But very, very FUN.
That that is what I am having...the BEST WEEK EVER!
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